not enough

A good night's sleep was not enough to help out and assist my return on Friday. I cried for most of Thursday evening, and I thought it was out of my system. That wasn't the first time I cried this week. I don't think it was the second, either. As the blocks passed by and we got closer to the school, the tears returned. I tried, but I couldn't shut them off. I was so disappointed in myself because I could not stop crying.

I could not stand in front of those kids and give them a lesson while in this state. So I handed my plans and worksheets to my husband, and asked him to hand them on to the MT. I went home when I could, and called in for support.

For professional reasons, I'm choosing not to publish the details of this situation. I'm adding supplemental logs (written in confidence, and password-protected) to this field log. I'm doing what I can to work out the situation, and make the appropriate changes. I have been advised to take further steps, but for now I am going to wait and see how this new dialogue works out.

I just want to do my job to the best of my ability. There are some changes that need to be addressed in order for me to do that.

... At the 2nd week, I lost my voice. I still taught, but it was extra-challenging. In another way, and about at the first or second week, I lost my voice. By yesterday - Friday, and in both cases, I got my voice back.

We'll see how it goes.